If you’re going to kill yourself, why don’t you sleep with me first? P2
Man: “Okay, I get it. Let me ask just one question so we can all cool down.”
Woman: “You’re just gonna tie it into something dirty again aren’t you?”
Man: “No, not at all. This time it’s a serious question. After you die, what are you gonna do?”
Woman: “… what do you mean?”
Man: “Heh, exactly what I said. Think about it.”
Woman: “Even if you say that I still don’t know what you’re getting at.”
Man: “What I’m saying is, what are you going to do after you kill yourself? I’m asking you to find out why you’re looking forward to killing yourself.”
Woman: “So you mean the world after death? Well there certainly seems to be a life after death and the existence of ghosts, doesn’t there?”
Man: “For sure. I think there’s merit in considering it.”
Woman: “So what will I do once I die, huh? Seems like I’d be able to do lots of things. Ah, but then there’s also whether you go to heaven or to hell.”
Man: “Surprisingly the more you think about it the more you can’t stop, right?”
Woman: “But even if I do think about it nothing will change.”
Man: “Well it’s connected to raising your desire to kill yourself.”
Woman: “I suppose so. Hmm, if I die I’ll find a dreamy boyfriend.”
Man: “You’re going to fall in love after you die?”
Woman: “Yes. I’m gonna find a dreamy ghost boyfriend. Then I’ll be happy. If I do that it’ll be proof that killing myself wasn’t a mistake.”
Man: “Seems fun.”
Woman: “It’s what you suggested, isn’t it?”
Man: “I guess so.”
Woman: “I don’t know anything about heaven or hell though so let’s just stop thinking about that right now.”
Man: “Okay.”
Woman: “What? Do you want to say something vulgar again?”
Man: “No. I was just thinking that it seems most people really do think that way, huh.”
Woman: “Think that way? About what?”
Man: “Haven’t you ever wondered about it?”
Woman: “… uh, about whether ghosts are real or not? Is that what you mean?”
Man: “No. Whether ghosts exist or not, I think that they do. Probably. Putting that aside, haven’t you ever questioned it? I mean ghost photos exist, right? Don’t you think those are really strange?”
Woman: “I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about.”
Man: “Well there are lots of different reasons as to why people die, so I can’t say for certain. Haven’t you ever heard stories like this about ghost photos? ‘The ghosts of people who kill themselves will appear in photos taken where they died.’ Don’t you think that’s strange?”
Woman: “Not really. If they have a strong grudge or something they’ll appear, something like that.”
Man: “Okay, well let me ask you a question. After you kill yourself do you really think you’ll want to appear in photos? Suicide is the result of wanting to be released from the existence of being a living person.”
Woman: “… well everyone’s different.”
Man: “But if, like you, you die and tie yourself to another ghost and become happy then you can’t take pictures together, right? Even if you do appear in a photo you’ll just show up in a way that terrifies people.”
Woman: “Could you just say what you want a little more clearly? I have no idea what you want to say.”
Man: “It’s just a question towards what everyone freely believes. You die and become a ghost. Well sure, that’s fine. The problem is after that. You become a ghost and you can see other ghosts. You couldn’t see them when you’re alive but when you die you can. Why do people think like that?”
Woman: “Even if you become a ghost, you can’t see other ghosts…?”
Man: “Strange, isn’t it? There are people who don’t believe in ghosts. But there’s not a single person who doesn’t think that once you die you won’t be able to see other ghosts.”
Woman: “So what are you trying to say? Are you threatening me with that to stop me from killing myself?”
Man: “Don’t make me repeat myself. I already told you I don’t have any right to stop you. I just wanted to get the ball rolling on this stagnating question.”
Woman: “I don’t especially care about your question.”
Man: “Really?”
Woman: “Don’t make me repeat myself.”
Man: “Ah, you’re copying me.”
Woman: “You copied me first.”
Man: “Well then you’re copying someone else.”
Woman: “Probably.”
Man: “I also felt this is an important question for you which is why I said it. Don’t you think it’s something someone who’s about to die should think about?”
Woman: “Whatever happens after death, I don’t especially care.”
Man: “Well then while you’re alive let’s think about it.”
Woman: “Okay… wait, why are we continuing this conversation again?”
Man: “Because. While we’re talking like this there’s no need to sleep with me.”
Woman: “Ha… have you ever been told before?”
Man: “Told what?”
Woman: “That you’re persistent.”
Man: “…”
Woman: “You’re thinking about it with a really serious face. You’ve heard it a lot, haven’t you?”
Man: “No. You’re the first.”
Woman: “I don’t need your lies.”
Man: “It’s the truth.”
Woman: “Yeah yeah. Then, what were we talking about?”
Man: “Hmm? You feel like talking now?”
Woman: “Because you won’t tell me.”
Man: “You sure do say tricky things.”
Woman: “Shut up. If you’re gonna talk, then talk. I’m going to kill myself you know.”
Man: “Yeah yeah. I know.”
Woman: “…”
Man: “Why do you think people are scared of dying?”
Woman: “I have no idea.”
Man: “Think about it a little.”
Woman: “Instinct.”
Man: “Instinct?”
Woman: “Humans are the only creatures who fear death. Animals just instinctively try to live.”
Man: “You have no romance.”
Woman: “Don’t say that so happily.”
Man: “I thought females were a little more… ‘sparkling’ than that.”
Woman: “You want someone who’s about to die to say romantic things with a sparkle in their eye?”
Man: “Ahaha, yeah I see.”
Woman: “Well what is a romantic reason to fear death then?”
Man: “I dunno whether it’s romantic, but to stop wondering about things is the same as dying, I think.”
Woman: “There might be a reason for that.”
Man: “Our daily lives are just full of mysteries and questions.”
Woman: “To live thinking like that must be fun, yes.”
Man: “Yeah, for sure.”
Woman: “… you’re thickheaded, aren’t you?”
Man: “Huh? What?”
Woman: “You heard me. And this conversation is going nowhere. Just tell me what you’re thinking.”
Man: “Okay, okay. Why do people who have never died fear death? In reality I don’t think we fear death itself that much.”
Woman: “Then what are we afraid of?”
Man: “What comes after death. In actuality we somehow know, don’t you think? What happens after death.”
Woman: “After death?”
Man: “Yeah. We vaguely know what’s ahead. Something even more painful than what we feel in life awaits us in death.”
Woman: “That’s no laughing matter”
Man: “No, it’s not. You don’t want to live anymore so you kill yourself, but something even more painful than that awaits you after.”
Woman: “You say that surprisingly with a smile.”
Man: “I’ve probably been doing that since the start, haven’t I?”
Woman: “Yeah. You’re the first person to ever smile like that while talking to me.”
Man: “Get out. You’re making me blush.”
Woman: “You’re also the first person I’ve spoken to that’s pissed me off this much. I hate people who talk like they know everything.”
Man: “Ah, me too.”
Woman: “I’m talking about you!”
Man: “You don’t have to say it, I do know.”
Woman: “People like you are the absolutely worst type of people for someone like me.”
Man: “From the point of view of someone about to kill themselves, a man who stops that is like a shinigami (god of death), right?”
Woman: “… and you just keep talking with that arrogant attitude like you know everything.”
Man: “Because even though you’re trying to escape from reality you just keep holding it back.”
Woman: “I really hate people like you. You take something trivial and then keep on nagging about it, it pisses me off. I hate people who look at you with pity as well. And people who mistake being a busy-body for kindness are also the worst.”
Man: “And yourself?”
Woman: “… I don’t want to think about it.”
Man: “And me?”
Woman: “You threw that in there well. I also hate you.”
Man: “What!? Why?!”
Woman: “You really can’t be questioning that!? I hate everyone. People who are happier than me and people who are more miserable than me. I hate every person that’s alive.”
Man: “So that means you don’t hate me then.”
Woman: “… huh?”
Man: “Well you just said it. ‘I hate every person that’s alive.’”
Woman: “What a stupid joke. It’s not even funny in the slightest.”
Man: “Even if it’s not a joke you wouldn’t laugh.”
Woman: “If my psychic powers suddenly bloomed now after all this it would be quite annoying.”
Man: “The world has become sensitive to lies lately. You’d probably just be called a fake psychic.”
Woman: “Then if I wrote books about ghosts they’d call me a ghost writer, huh.”
Man: “Seems like you want to die more and more, hey.”
Woman: “… anyway, if you’re gonna lie about such a thing you should have prepared a little more beforehand.”
Man: “Prepared?”
Woman: “When I saw the janitor on the rooftop earlier you hid on purpose, right?”
Man: “That’s right.”
Woman: “If she couldn’t see you, there would be no reason to…”
Man: “Something wrong?”
Woman: “… Right. You hid. The first time I saw the janitor.”
Man: “…”
Woman: “But the second time I saw her you didn’t hide. She said, ‘It’s dangerous out there so be careful on the street come nighttime.’ She wouldn’t say such a thing if a man and a woman were together…?”
Man: “Perhaps it was just that you didn’t notice and I secretly hid.”
Woman: “… but you didn’t eat anything at McDonalds either. You didn’t go and get us a seat either. Which means the gazes I felt in the store were…”
Man: “You finally realised, huh?”
Woman: “Huh? Ha… hang on a minute. You mean to everyone around me it just looked like I was talking to myself?”
Man: “I told you, didn’t I? Hurry up and eat so we can leave.”
Woman: “There’s no way I’d understand what you meant!”
Man: “Oh my, are you okay? That’s the most dreadful face you’ve made so far.”
Woman: “I’m well aware that I’ve lead a life full of embarrassments… ah… No, wait.”
Man: “You want to say something again?”
Woman: “If you’re a ghost that means I can’t touch you, right?”
Man: “Well, who knows? Perhaps unexpectedly you can.”
Woman: “…”
Man: “Uh, that look in your eyes is scary… What are you…?!”
Woman: “Wowow… you, you really are see-through…!”
Man: “No no no. Why did you try to hit me? If I were alive you would have broken my nose!”
Woman: “… just because. Don’t worry about such trivial things.”
Man: “I happen to think that’s actually rather important.”
Woman: “So why didn’t you tell me right from the start anyway? Thanks to you I embarrassed myself.”
Man: “Don’t worry about it. The end is in sight anyway.”
Woman: “That’s not the problem here.”
Man: “You really are a difficult person.”
Woman: “Shut up and answer my question.”
Man: “Well I didn’t think you’d believe me. If I suddenly introduced myself as a ghost would you believe me?”
Woman: “Well to start with you haven’t told me anything about yourself other than you can’t get any unless you pay for it.”
Man: “Ahaha. That was rather careless of me. But even if I did introduce myself properly, would you have believed me?”
Woman: “Of course not. But when the janitor came to the roof you would have been able to explain yourself then, right?”
Man: “Well I got kind of excited… it was kind of like I was alive again!”
Woman: “You get excited even though you’re dead?”
Man: “I do, yes. I don’t know about other people though.”
Woman: “… but why can I see you?”
Man: “Now that I really don’t know.”
Woman: “Really?”
Man: “You can bet your life on it.”
Woman: “Idiot.”
Man: “This is the first time for me too, you know.”
Woman: “First time?”
Man: “Talking to someone since I died.”
Woman: “…”
Man: “How many years have passed since I died? I don’t even know. If I were to guess it’s probably been at least five years or so.”
Woman: “You’ve been a ghost for a while then, huh?”
Man: “Yeah. But you’re the first person to respond to me trying to talk to them. And you can even see me! It’s a miracle.”
Woman: “A miracle, huh?”
Man: “What’s wrong?”
Woman: “… I don’t want you to get me wrong so I’m just gonna come right out and say it. I really don’t like people like you who are always so cryptic.”
Man: “I’m a ghost.”
Woman: “Shut up. Even though you’re a man you’re so focused on the little things.”
Man: “Ah ha! That’s a controversial statement!”
Woman: “This conversation isn’t going to go anywhere so whatever, that’s fine. While I’m at it, I’m not really that concerned about you either. However I do feel a little sad for you.”
Man: “Why?”
Woman: “Because of all the people who could see you, it was me. You have an unrivaled love of talking, even I can see that.”
Man: “Please, continue.”
Woman: “Finally someone can see you and it turns out to be me, a good for nothing woman… I feel a little guilty. You would have rathered meet someone a little more fun, right?”
Man: “…”
Woman: “But I will say that I only feel just a little guilty, okay. Don’t get me wrong here.”
Man: “… I’m glad it was you though.”
Woman: “I’m sorry? Are you begging me? You’re rather audacious for a layman.”
Man: “Ahaha. Has no-one ever said it to you before?”
Woman: “Said what?”
Man: “That your speech and conduct are so forceful.”
Woman: “…”
Man: “You don’t have to think about it so hard, you’ve heard it many times, right?”
Woman: “No. You’re the first.”
Man: “Lies! Although probably not.”
Woman: “I don’t usually speak like this. Like, talking to people is extremely tiring and I can’t really do much other than trifling small talk. I don’t have any friends I can speak my heart to. Before you approached me it was like, well I didn’t care anymore. It’s the first time I’ve ever said such mean things to a person before. I should probably be the one who’s glad that it was you who approached me.”
Man: “What’s this? Are you by any chance trying to make a move on me?”
Woman: “Drop dead.”
Man: “No way. I already died long ago.”
Woman: “… if you don’t want to answer then you don’t have to.”
Man: “Hmm?”
Woman: “How did you die?”
Man: “Oh, suicide.”
Woman: “You killed yourself?”
Man: “Was that unexpected?”
Woman: “I have no idea. Can you tell me a little more?”
Man: “… well actually I used to live in this apartment building.”
Woman: “No way, did you die here?”
Man: “Oh my veranda, yes.”
Woman: “Did you jump over?”
Man: “No. I lived on the third floor so there was a good chance it wouldn’t kill me. So in order to make sure I absolutely would die I hung myself.”
Woman: “You hung yourself…”
Man: “It’s more reliable than jumping. If you’re going to jump you want to make sure it’ll kill you.”
Woman: “Why did you kill yourself?”
Man: “For a similar reason to yourself. But to put it simply, I wanted to go somewhere that wasn’t here I suppose.”
Woman: “Heaven?”
Man: “Or perhaps hell. But when I opened my eyes after hanging myself I was in despair. For some reason I was in front of this apartment building. At first I didn’t even know if I was dead or not. I felt like I’d just become a see-through person rather than a ghost, and furthermore being a ghost is rather inconvenient.”
Woman: “Inconvenient?”
Man: “I can pass through doors and things but I can’t pass through walls.”
Woman: “Ha. That’s unexpected.”
Man: “I thought that maybe I’d be able to fly as well but I can’t. I wondered if I would appear in photos so I tried as well.”
Woman: “Did you appear?”
Man: “I don’t know. I’ve never been able to check. I’ve also tried entering the female hot springs.”
Woman: “… should I be hearing this story?”
Man: “Surprisingly I couldn’t pass under the shop curtain.”
Woman: “What do you mean?”